Saturday, July 01, 2006

I Did Not Make This Up

Do you see this?

chickenbag (2)


Do you see my colleague defensively cuddling his CHICKEN BAG? Do you see the accusing finger pointing at his CHICKEN BAG?
That finger doesn't even belong to me. It belongs to one of my flying monkeys whose job it is to spy for me, and to report back on things like CHICKEN BAGS.

Don't go telling me that this minister is young and cute and hip and he can get away with it. That isn't the POINT!!

It's a BAG shaped like a CHICKEN! He had things IN IT and was WEARING IT over his SHOULDER in PUBLIC!

I REALIZE that I was once seen on the crosstown bus in Washington, DC with Boy In The Bands wearing a stuffed monkey around my neck that screeched when you pressed its tummy, but that was on MY DAY OFF.


Anonymous philocrites said...

I wish to defend my esteemed friend and his CHICKEN BAG. How many UUs do you know whose sense of humor overrides their sense of earnestness? (He did bond with PeaceBang over another fine capitalized word, however: They both love BANJO!)

4:02 PM  
Blogger LaReinaCobre said...

That's just plain kooky. Or should I say cuckoo?

4:06 PM  
Blogger boyinthebands said...

Is that defensive cuddling, or just affection?

6:12 PM  
Anonymous Sarah said...

I join Philocrites in defense of said friend and said bag. The fuzzy chicken bag is *so* purposefully ridiculous that it scores the wearer some ministry points, in my book. He is a renegade, a trendsetter. A minister who marches to the beat of his own tambourine. I'd certainly be more interested in hearing his sermons because of the chicken bag. They'd probably be more interesting than your average bear's.

9:29 PM  
Blogger PeaceBang said...

THAT DOES IT! I'm definitely bringing my Paul Michaels monkey bag to GA next year, then. It's orange and has a huge monkey face in the back.

9:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let’s be frank. Here is a man with an unusually large head. Note the wide forehead, the apish shelf of a brow. The great billowing cheeks. And the jaw? A mere speedbump on the way down to the fleshy and stubbled neck region.

Oh, it may be a mid-afternoon, street-corner cuddle (defensive or no) that this man is enjoying with his faux white zippered bird. But it also might show that, when it comes to fashion, he knows just what he’s doing.

A fellow with a head as balloonish as the one we see here needs to clothe himself with an eye to a thinning effect. With that thought, consider: what else says “thin” like a chicken says “thin?” Conjure the stick-ish legs. Recall the sharp beak. Bring to mind, if you will, the spindly veins that we’re all aware run hither and thither, throughout your whole hen. In other words, thin. A chicken says thin. Poultry, worn tastefully, can thin the large man, and shrink the over-sized head down to nothing at all.

We can agree that the man in this photo is a good-looking man. Exceptionally good-looking. But he’s not only good-looking (or exceptionally so). He’s fashion-savvy, as well. God has given him the hat-size of 11. And the man has wisely responded by purchasing himself a strappy slender hen bag. Perfect. Just perf. There’s a reason heads were turning in St. Louis this June.

9:56 PM  
Blogger PeaceBang said...

By God, you're right.

Poultry is the new black.

10:03 PM  
Blogger MauKatt said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

2:51 AM  
Blogger PeaceBang said...

Mau, Hello Kitty can be very hip and ironic. My priest friend Stephanie has a very subtle Hello Kitty briefcase that I love. I think it's hilarious.

6:33 PM  
Blogger MauKatt said...

Subtle? lol... we're not talking subtle when it comes to my Hello Kitty carryall.... (However, it's the perfect size for my NIV Exhaustive Concordance!)

But I'd removed my original comment because I'd realized it only marred the artistic perfection of this whole comment thread. Truly, "Poultry is the new black" should be the final statement.

Alas, now it is not.

If you have a way of completely deleting my comments, I would feel much less guilty at having added my scribbles to your masterpiece. ;D

6:54 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home